Rory McIlroy Saved by Friend from All-Time Choke Job

The Green Jacket was all but locked up for Rory McIlroy for the 2025 Masters tournament, with McIlroy up 1 stroke going into the 18th. McIlroy started the final hole 1 stroke ahead of Rose with a decent drive on the fairway on the Par 4. As Rory is accustomed to doing though, he found a way to fuck it up. His second shot dropped sharply into the bunker about 50 feet to the right of the hole. He seemingly recovered, however, wedging his third shot about 5 feet to the right of the 18th hole with a chance to go for par and secure his first Master's win. The Master's Championship is the only major win in the sport that has eluded Rory throughout his entire career. However, a true ball knower could see that Rory was beginning to falter on the final 9 of Sunday's round, as he struggled to hit putts down the stretch that could have secured his victory throughout the day. The ball knowers could see the sweat building up on his face with his knees shaking with each putt. The world almost rejoiced as he barfed all over himself.

Rory McIlroy 2025 Masters

Unfortunately, for anyone else that put their house for sale (I definitely didn't do this) to bet on Rose today, McIlroy secured his victory in the the first hole of the Playoff with a birdie on the par 4 18th hole. As the betting favorite coming into the tournament, it wasn't that impressive that the guy won the tournament he so blatantly tried to give away. Rose (an alleged friend of McIlroy's who should probably be investigated by the FBI, Interpol, and FTC), shot for par after blowing a putt for birdie in the playoff. Rose didn't even try to hold back his happiness for McIlroy and sprinted right at the Master's champion to lick the tears off of his face. Pretty clear and obvious throw from Rose should have the former champion banned from future participation in the tournament. Is there no integrity in this beloved sport anymore?